Wednesday, February 15, 2012

The rough draft of the talk that I gave in church.

Good morning! I’m Chanda Crossman, I’m recovering from the flu. I’m majoring in Psychology at the University and I’m from Pinetop-Lakeside. I feel like that is all you really need to know but if you’re curious about more I love talking to people so feel free to introduce yourself.
Speaking of talking to people, last week I was talking to my friends after sacrament meeting and discussing the possibility of going on a mission next year when Brother Miller told me I was going to talk. I joked around with my friends that if the topic was missionary work I would have my answer. Then at break the fast I found out the topic is “Preaching my Gospel.” That was a close call. Had he worded that differently my fate would have been set.
Regardless, I’m really excited to give this talk and all those other clichés. I haven’t ever spoken in this ward. In fact I haven’t spoken in church since high school I think. Bad news is, this talk is supposed to be 5 times longer than any talk I’ve ever been assigned, so I’d like to apologize in advance­­­­­­­­­­­­ if it doesn’t quite make the cut. When I get nervous I talk really fast. So I’ve tried to prepare 40 minutes of material and I think I can easily condense it down into ten.. I mean twenty. Last time I did talk was in my home ward in high school and the girl who was translating my talk into sign language apologized to the people whom she was signing to and gave up within the first thirty seconds (which contained the content of the first two minutes). Thankfully we don’t have a translator so we should be okay.
So, what is the gospel? According to Mormon.org: Mormons, for all the other things that set us apart, believe first and foremost that Jesus Christ is our Savior and Redeemer. We believe that through Him, all mankind may enjoy eternal life with their families in Heavenly Father’s kingdom (John 3:16). We also believe that we lived with God as spirits before we were born (Romans 8:16), and that according to His plan of happiness we can come to earth to receive physical bodies in order to learn and grow. Through the work done in Mormon Temples, we believe our family relationships can be sealed eternally. All this is contingent on our living righteous lives according to God’s divine guidance, as revealed by prophets, and repenting when we make mistakes. The Church’s mission is to help us meet the challenges of this life so that we will be worthy of the temporal and spiritual blessings God wants for us.
I also like to turn to the Articles of Faith when people ask me about the basic beliefs our church holds. And to point out some of the things that I appreciate most about it, like the importance we place on personal revelation and also the power of the priesthood and that we have a living prophet, just like Moses or Noah, that leads us today.
Why is it important to share the Gospel? Well, clearly we believe that it is important to us. We have a job to do. It is our responsibility to share what we know. We are privileged and blessed to have the opportunities and the testimonies that we have, why wouldn’t we want to share that great joy? We’re like the one percent in richness of the truth of the Gospel, but the 99 percent aren’t holding protests because we are sharing what we know.
I like to think of it like every week I go to a great restaurant or see a rad movie that I think my friends will really enjoy- of course I tell them about it. Why wouldn’t I? The same can be said of the church. I’ve been blessed to a degree that I can’t even comprehend and I am so so happy about it, I would love for all of my friends to feel the same way. We know that in order to live with God again, which will make us the happiest, we need to accept Christ’s gospel and make covenants with Him. That is why we share the messages we share, because we want others to be with us after we die.
Also, we should share because there are people who want to know. There are people who are searching and honestly seeking for the truth. How terrible is it that someone can’t find the answers they are looking for because all of us are afraid of getting told that someone isn’t interested? As is common when writing talks, I read an article on lds.org that had this quote that I liked: The deep yearning of countless numbers is expressed in the plea of one who spoke to Philip of old: “How can I [find my way], except some man should guide me” (Acts 8:31). We are those men and women that have the knowledge to guide people to the light of Christ.
I am a sucker for the concept of neighborly love. I just adore the idea of showing everyone that mean something to someone. We all have these feelings of love that we get to share. With our roommates, families, friends, ward, visiting or home teaching assignments, fiancés, etc; but we also have the love of Christ that we have felt. And we should share that too.  Even if there are people that we personally loathe or really don’t get along with, Christ loves them and that in itself should be reason enough to care about their future salvation and share with them.
In that however, we shouldn’t just be friends or put up with people in the hopes of getting them converted. I just mean that it is important to show others that you care. If people know and can sense how much they mean to you, they’ll like you more and value your opinion more than if you were just a casual acquaintance.
How do we share the gospel? It’s easy, just open your mouth about it. Just keep living in a way that shows your beliefs. So much can be said about being an example of the believers. I love the quote “I want to live in a way so that those who know me but don’t know Christ will want to know Christ because they know me.” What a powerful way to think. It can empower every action we take and every conversation we have. I’ll talk in a bit about how a lot of our fear is getting rejected about something so personal. But the fact that the Gospel is so personal is to our advantage. It’s easy to talk about it because it influences so much of our lives. We do certain things because of our beliefs, like attending church on Sundays and FHE on Mondays and institute on Tuesdays and Thursdays and the temple on Saturdays. We pray every day, we read scriptures daily, we bless our food before we eat it. We also don’t do certain things because of our beliefs. We don’t go shopping on Sundays, we don’t drink coffee, we don’t cuss very much. All of these things are opportunities to share the gospel.
So, what’s the holdup on preaching the gospel? Clearly it is beneficial to everyone involved, you get to share and thus strengthen your testimony and others get to hear the Word of God.
I feel that oftentimes people are afraid to share the gospel because of a few main things. One, that they will be rejected; two, that it is unwanted; and three, that church is a private subject and doesn’t need to be talked about with a lot of people.
To address these fears, I offer some examples of worst and best case scenarios.
I always learn best through stories and analogies so I’m going to try to keep things fresh and give different examples of times where people have shared the Gospel successfully- to give us hope and remind us of the importance- and of times where people shared the Gospel and it was ignored – because I think it is important to remember that not everyone is ready to accept the Gospel and being rejected has happened to other people too, it isn’t personal.
And of course, there will be those times in which you share the Gospel and it is well-received. Countless stories exist of these occurrences, some of them are old and famous and some of them are more personal.
Fear one: We often fear our message being rejected. For many of us, the Gospel is such a part of our lives and identities that having someone reject it feels like a personal assault. It feels like they are telling us that we are wrong and we are stupid. To combat these fears we need to recognize that some people just aren’t ready to accept the messages that the church sends.
I’m always so afraid to speak up about the church. In fact, even last night I was talking to my boss and hesitated before telling her that I was speaking in church just because I wasn’t sure how she felt about my religion. I did tell her though and she seemed interested, but it took some mental pep talking to actually speak up about it. It is so silly in retrospect because, really, what was she going to say? “I think it’s stupid that you’re speaking you don’t know anything?” That’s not very likely. And she was very nice about it, she asked what my topic was and how long I was going to speak. I probably should have invited her to come. Hindsight is 20/20.
I think a lot of that hesitation is because it is such an integral part of who I am that if people reject it, I’ll feel like they rejected me too. And, as discussed earlier, it is a good thing that we feel such a personal connection to the Gospel and the teachings of Christ, it is important to realize that sometimes people just aren’t ready. I’m sure we can all think of times where we tried to share a message and it was just met with refusal or denial. I used to pick up my nonmember friend for church every week and she just never really committed or seemed excited about it. We fell out of contact after high school and just a few months ago we started chatting and I found out that she reads the Bible regularly and is establishing a relationship with God. And I’m so so happy for her. Now, this doesn’t mean that I did anything wrong when we used to go to church together- I didn’t scare her away, she just wasn’t really ready to commit herself to change but she is now. That’s what I tell myself anyway.
Once, a young man thought he was ready to join the church but after asking the prophet of the time- Jesus Christ- what he needed to do, he went away sorrowfully. In this story, the man was asking about the church but still wasn’t ready to give up his earthly possessions. This has many similarities to our current day. The church has high moral standards and we have to accept that some people aren’t yet willing to give up things of the world in order to find a church, especially when so many churches are willing to accept the bad decisions they are making. We can’t avoid sharing the gospel just because we don’t know who is going to say yes and who will say no. When I find myself struggling with saying something to a friend I always try to remember how terrible it would feel if they came up to me after death and asked why I hadn’t shared with them what I knew. That is usually motive enough.
I asked some missionaries what their advice would be on how to better preach the gospel. Elder Bert Grabinger, whom many of you are well acquainted with, gave this advice: Don't be afraid to share with your friends your beliefs.  Plant that seed. If a missionary said it, especially Elder Grabinger, you know you can’t ignore it. Elder Zac Baker discussed this a little in his last letter also, he said that before his mission he would just make up goofy excuses as to why he did things a certain way but that now he hopes he would be braver in just explaining things, even without preaching or pushing his beliefs. Let’s learn from their advice and just not be afraid any more. What’s the worst that will happen, really?
The second fear I wish to address is that the message is unwanted. There are ways to let others know that you have strong beliefs without being overbearing. It is important to remember that everyone needs to hear the truth. Sharing the Gospel is like applying for scholarships. You only get like 5% of what you apply to. So you need to share with a lot of people to find those ones that are looking for it. You don’t ever want to regret not saying something.
Going along with the scholarships analogy, there are ways to better your odds if you are shy. A good way to get an idea of who to share with is by doing simple things that make it widely known that you are a member of the Church. This can be easy and doesn’t need to be overbearing. When someone asks what you did for the weekend, answer that you went to church, or mention that you take an institute class every week. Those small things that I discussed earlier that define so much of what we do or don’t do can be opportunities to share. By doing these you are advertising, in a sense, that you are a good person to ask about religion.
I’ll share an example of someone just following their beliefs and the impact that had. Someone I know grew up as a practicing Catholic in Snowflake, Arizona, which is basically a miniature Provo, I think at this time Snowflake’s population was over 90% LDS. After he graduated high school he kept asking girls to go on dates with him and none of them were allowed to because he wasn’t a member. After being rejected one particular time, or by one particularly attractive girl I’m not sure which, he decided to read the Book of Mormon to prove it wrong. Fast forward a few months and he was baptized. He later served a mission and had a family with two handsome sons and three beautiful daughters, all members of the church. Little did this girl know that by rejecting my dad she would have an impact on countless numbers of people.  My dad never did date her but I’m really grateful that she helped push him toward the church.
Another piece of advice from Elder Grabinger: LOOK for opportunities.  Don't just hope that one pops up. Cause even if it does, you'll miss it if you're not looking.
It is important that we pray to be aware of opportunities around us. Not only should we be listening TO the Holy Ghost, but we also need to be listening FOR the Holy Ghost. Also, remember that opportunities might not wait for you to get brave. You need to heed them when you find them, they are called PROMPTings not  “do laterings.” We must act fast and faithfully, keeping in mind that God wouldn’t ask us to do something that will ever hurt us.
Even if you don’t feel comfortable bringing up the subject to everyone you know, you can always tell strangers that you may never see again. I have a friend who used to put pass along cards on every car she passed as she walked into the grocery store and she always parked far away from the entrance so she passed a lot of cars. I know someone else who picked up someone’s tab and instead of putting down her number or name or anything, she just left a note with Mormon.org written on it. Things like that increase the likelihood that someone will look into our church and if they are ready they will have their answer.
The third fear that must be faced is that church and religion are private and needn’t be discussed with very many people. In my experience, it is easiest to discuss the church in environments with no pressure, when all opinions are heard and none are criticized. I have had a few of these types of discussions and I have found that they most often happen when there is already mutual respect and love established between the parties involved. An important characteristic to have when discussing religion, and other personal things like it, is love. If someone knows that the reason you are bringing up your beliefs is because you love and care for that person and you feel comfortable enough with them to talk about it, they will be much less likely to hate you for it. When Christ was teaching on earth, He always did it with love. His compassion for the people He was teaching was made evident in stories like 3rd Nephi where it says that his heart was touched. My friend, Kalee, is from Idaho and is on a mission in Peru she has been gone for almost a year and this was her advice: The best way is to be a really good friend, the way Christ was. We need to love love love our friends. And give our friendship to those who need us most, even when it´s difficult. Even when we´re tired. (Especially recent converts. Please go be their friends. They need a lot of support.)
Love can be so easy to show. I made a goal one day to smile at everyone I made eye contact with. And yeah, it was awkward and I probably made a lot of people wonder why the creepy blonde chick was grinning at them, but I also made a new friend that day. And I like to think that maybe someone else’s day was made. Maybe that is just optimism granted to me by those pass it on commercials. Some of the times I have felt the most love is just when one of my friends texts me and asks about something going on in my life, or lets me know that they were thinking about me. How much effort does that really take? But what an impact. There are just so many ways to show how much we care, and if it makes opportunities to share the Gospel more available to us, even better! It goes back to the quote that I already quoted but will quote again. Live in a way so that those who don’t know Christ, but know you, will want to know Christ because they know you.
So, now I’ve addressed the three main fears, I feel that my job is done. Just kidding.
But really, the world is in need of our help. There are feet to steady, hands to grasp, minds to encourage, hearts to inspire, and souls to save. The harvest truly is great. Let there be no mistake about it; the missionary opportunity of a lifetime is ours. The blessings of eternity await us. Ours is the privilege to be, not spectators, but participants on the stage of service to others.
To prepare, let’s remember that it is better to share with many people and find those who are searching than to never share with anyone and have the regret that may come when one of your friends or acquaintances questions why you didn’t share with them when you had so much. Let’s not let the 99% ever get to the point where they feel the need to occupy Mormons because we don’t share sufficiently.
I know it is scary and hard and super intimidating. But I also know that someday, something will happen that will make it all worth it. It’s like dating, you may have to date a lot of people and get rejected a lot before you find your FEC, but once you find that person you will recognize that the search to find them was worth it.
You never know who you will touch or how you will affect them. One of my jobs is as a receptionist so I try to always greet everyone that walks in. One of the tutors commented to my friend that he should have guessed I was Mormon with how friendly I was. Planting seeds, that is our goal. Sharing the Gospel doesn’t mean baptizing someone every week, although I’m sure the missionaries would agree that that would be fantastic. It just means getting people ready and willing to hear the Word so that when they are curious and ready to accept change and make commitments, they will know where to turn and who to turn to. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. But if the horse knows where the water is, when it is thirsty it will come back.
I always hope to live in a way that other people never question how much they mean to me and I pray that that will open up doors to sharing the Gospel. I also pray that I’ll be brave enough to open my mouth as those doors are opened.
I’ve been incredibly blessed and comforted with the knowledge I have from being raised as a member of this church. I always hope to keep that with me and be able to share with others.

Getting the flu is the worst.

I wrote a bit about having the flu last week. I'm STILL sniffling. It's been 9 days people!
I am very grateful that I was only out of the game for 2 of them, the other 7 I have been going to school and work and carrying on in my normal, if sniffly, way.
Also, in one of my classes I had a test on Thursday of last week. Since I had missed Tuesday's class I was pretty worried, but the TA for that class was incredibly kind and met with me on Wednesday to go over what I had missed both in class AND at the study session that had happened Tuesday night. I was incredibly thankful for that and I ended up getting 34.5/35 on my test! :D
I had another test today, I would like to say it went just as good.. But it didn't. I hope to have pulled off a B, but I'm not sure. I expected it to be easy and I was very disappointed. Unfortunately, I had studied as if it were going to be easy.
I had a Spanish quiz yesterday and got a 19/20 on it. So overall my academics aren't terrible. :) I've been very blessed to have an intellect that remembers and recalls things easily.
Also, I spoke in church on Sunday. I was actually really happy with how my talk turned out. I spoke about preaching the gospel. And I spoke for an entire 22 minutes. That is easily 11x as long as any other talk I've given. I was really proud for speaking slowly and whatnot, then Brother Miller told me he had no idea I could speak so fast. And later Steven told me that had English been his second language he wouldn't have understood what I said. Despite my apparent lightning-fast speaking speed, I talked for just the right amount of time. I also got some really good laughs at appropriate times. The man who I spoke with said that I had the congregation eating out of the palm of my hand. I'm not certain that is the case, but I was pleased. I also went off-script for a lot of my talk. Which was scary but exhilarating. And-- only like 2 paragraphs of that entire talk weren't written by me. I'll post a copy of what I had planned on saying, I don't expect it to be read- but if you are curious. I think it will probably lose some of the poignancy not being read aloud, but the gist of it was a good message.

In other news, Valentine's day was yesterday. I didn't post any statements about it. Even though I thought about it a lot. But I had a really good day. It was busy, since I had a test the next day and a quiz on the day. I also had to go to office hours for Spanish to make up the points for having been absent.
That was comical, I wasn't expecting my professor to speak Spanish at office hours, but she did. I made a fool of myself. Usually there is a 2-3 second lag between what she says and me comprehending it. Which in class is fine, because I can keep up and everything. But one on one... I looked like a fool.
I also had a presentation in my night class yesterday, so I had to meet up with my partner for that. And I made cupcakes for the class and they had to be frosted. My cupcakes, by the way, were so good. I put a knock-off Oreo on the bottom of each cupcake and then made Devil's food mix but mixed in some brownie mix and sour cream. They were pretty tasty. Also, Roland and I frosted them with pink cream cheese frosting (shout out to my mom for getting me a cake decorating kit for Christmas, she's the best). Super tasty. If you've never had a cupcake with an oreo baked inside, you must try it sometime. It's surprisingly delicious. Not surprising in that oreos are usually gross, I was just surprised at the extent to which it changed the flavor of the cupcake.
Roland had taken the day off (have I mentioned that I'm dating Roland? I am.) so we could hang out and I felt bad because I just dragged him around wherever I went. Also, we had to walk to my meeting and office hours and while we were walking IT SNOWED ON US. I was so upset. (Roland keeps telling people I said the f-word, rest assured, I did not. I may have felt like it, but I didn't.) Anyway, he got me Happy Hippos- which are my favorite ever and they're only really sold one place so I'm thrilled. And he got me TWO superman shirts. Gosh I love Superman. I wanted to wear one of them today, but as you might have guessed considering my aforementioned statement about the weather- it was too cold. Roland and I also made dinner and it was super delicious. And then we did homework. iQue romantica! ;)

Anyway, it had been awhile since I blogged so I decided to update with these humble details of my life. Below are photos. :)


Superman shirts that I own. It's funny, because I got one from Keegan, one from Jenkin, three from Roland, one with (but not from) Jason, and I got one on my own. :) Super-men.

Dinner and also cupcakes. Chloe had not locked my car once and so to apologize she bought Roland and I sparkling apple/grape juice for dinner :)
Also, those are the leftover cupcakes in the  background. I had two for breakfast this morning. Then, after lunch, I went to Roland's mom's house and she gave me another cupcake (that she had made) and it was so delicious. It was red velvet with a Godiva dark chocolate truffle baked inside and white chocolate buttercream frosting. Mmmm. I love me some cupcakes.

Whole wheat tortellini, salad with grapes, cheesy garlic bread, bean salad...

Roland, opening up the juice.

Oh and I got new glasses! This is one pair, I like them a lot.

I love you all!

Chanda C.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Gratitude

Well I'm sick again.
As if being sick for over a month last semester wasn't bad enough, right?
I got the flu.
But I'm incredibly grateful for the things that are making me feel better, namely:

-modern medicine (painkillers!!!)
-Roland who made me soup and came over and spent time with me (he'll probably be sick soon, not because we made out (CHLOE), but because he was around so much)
-Roland and Michael for giving me a blessing
-The Priesthood. Seriously.
-warm bed
-Tucson breeze
-Luna for cuddling me endlessly
-hot water to shower in when it felt like my bones were being scraped clean
-friends in classes who offered to let me borrow their notes
-emails from understanding professors

I hate the flu. But I'm glad I live in a time where there are things to make me feel better.

Chanda C.