The Right Now

Found this recently and decided to publish it now. I can't remember why I didn't publish it when I wrote it, so ... There we go.

Two years ago I was on a road trip to Florida with my best friend. My life plan looked like this:

-Disney internship until January 2015, leave on a mission right after, get back from mission in August 2016 with Erik, move to Tucson, be with Erik forever.

Then the Disney internship didn't work out very well so I moved to Minnesota and changed my life plan:

-Submit mission papers ASAP, leave MN by November, get home before Erik and get a job in Tucson, welcome Erik home, be with Erik forever.

Then my call came in and I had to wait until the very end of December:

-Leave for mission in December, get home slightly before Erik, welcome Erik home, be with Erik forever.

Then I broke my back in December:

-Leave for mission in March, get home a month after Erik, be with Erik forever.

Then I got a hernia:

-Come home for February, return to mission in March after surgery, get home a month after Erik, be with Erik forever.

Then the surgery took 5ever:

-Get surgery someday, get a job sometime, bide time until then.... be with Erik forever.

I finally got the surgery. And now I am in the job process. I have been offered a couple of positions in Tucson but none that I have felt really good about taking. I have some applications in that I am really hopeful about. We will see.

But this "right now" nonsense is killing me. I AM SO BORED (and lonely). It has literally been years since I lived in the same city as my best friend (excluding that stint where H' Ivey was my companion -- she's the bomb). I know that all of this nonsense will be worth it in the long run, I'll get through it, life is good, "attitude is a choice," blah blah blah. But hot dang, it sucks right now.

If I had a dime for every time someone has told me "you're just in a transition phase right now, it will pass" I would have enough money to move to Tucson. Transition phase or not, 2 years of treading water has worn me out. I am ready for some permanency. A job, an apartment, and planning things with someone instead of by myself. I am so excited for when my best friend lives in the United States again. And I am so excited for when I live in Tucson close to so many people who I love.

Anyway, in other, less depressing news- I got to see Aaron and Melanie! My dad invited me to go to Utah with him. It was really fun. Salt Lake City had pretty nice weather, I drove a quad for the first time, A and M's apartment is so cute, I got to eat tacos and brownies, Mel did my hair a few times, we went to an aquarium! I am so thankful for my family.

Also my mom and I got to go to California to pick up my stuff. It was awesome seeing people from my mission again. I love so many people there. And H' Ramirez made me arroz con leche! :D If that isn't love, I don't know what is.

And! My cousin Derek got home from his mission! Currently I have no family members out on missions. It is crazy how phases of life come and go.